This article focuses on a very important subject: Shidduchim. There are halachas that pertain to the general public when giving information, and there are halaches or specific ways a shaddchen can give information.
Within the course of our ongoing shidduch meetings an incident was brought to our attention that I think will illustrate the point perfectly.
THE LESSON LEARNED HERE THAT IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU FOR INFORMATION ON A SHIDDUCH DO NOT PLAY G-D!
The names I use here are not the real names but it will make the story easier to understand.
Mrs. Katz had a daughter that needed a shidduch. She knew that her neighbor knew the boy that was mentioned, so she called her neighbor who also happened to be a schaddchen for information on this boy. It seems that the neighbor had someone else in mind for this boy. This is the way she answered:
"Oh, this boy is not for you. This shidduch will never happen it is not a match!" She gave no valid reason as to why this shidduch will not happen.
B"H the shidduch did happen, and within the course of the conversation between the two new machatunim it was brought out that the other shaddchen was indeed pushing another shidduch!
The second incident that happened was that a girl was suggested to a boy from a very nice family. This girl worked in a place with a nice boss. The boy's father knew the boss well so he asked for information on this girl. The boss gave information that almost stopped the shidduch, but after more research was done, the negative information the boss gave turned out to be not true!
Again, the shidduch happened and real truth as to why he gave the information came to light! He wanted this girl for his nephew!
PLEASE TRY TO LEARN FROM THIS, THAT WHEN SOMEONE ASKS FOR INFORMATION THAT IS WHAT THEY WANT. JUST GIVE THEM WHAT THEY ARE ASKING FOR.
IN BOTH THESE CASES INFORMATION WAS ASKED BUT OPINIONS WERE GIVEN INSTEAD .
 |
|
|
